Bonus Blog Tuesday! Thinking off guard: beware the crazy

Have you ever thought about your own thoughts?  Do they go from 0-300 in 2.4 seconds like mine?  Here's a few examples: 

- He said my butt looks smaller.  He is looking at my butt! 

-Why does my dog feel the need to be the cream in the Oreo cookie in bed? Doesn't she know you can't eat cookies in bed? 

!Source!

-I really want to go on Flea Market Flip. My hubby and I could win that!  That counts as quality time as a couple, right? 

-Should I dye my hair? Will my husband notice or is he too busy looking at my butt? 

-How long before you take birthdays of people you use to know off your phone calendar? If I keep putting it off, I may be celebrating birthdays of people who hate me forever...is that the Christian thing to do? 

-Kitchen magic: when only one person in the house can see the floor needs swept. 

-Do men have garage magic because I gotta tell Ya, I never care how dirty it looks. 

-Mmm, coffee! When God sent manna from heaven it was really instant coffee, I know it! 

-People really wait outside for 24 hours for a new Krispy Kreme?  I'm thinking donuts now.  Great there goes my smaller butt! 

-Deflategate: what happens when you squeeze a boob too hard especially at the wrong time of the month?  What? It's about balls? Well I'm not going there!  Oh footballs! Well the Patriots cheat. I know because I saw it on South Park. 

-What blizzard? It's going to be 70 today in Dallas. I would love a Texas Style blizzard which means everything shuts down with some snow/ice combo.  Bring on the blizzard. 

-Do people oversees really like President Obama that much?  They can keep him if they want. 

-Why don't people pay me to tweet and blog and spend a day on Pinterest?  Have you seen my Pinterest?  I have some good stuff on there.  I mean, really!  

-He noticed my butt!