Monday, November 23, 2015

How to survive in Texas without an oil well

I grew up in Indiana, well at least the first part of my life.  When I moved to Texas at 10, I swore I would never become a Texan.   Up until that point the only person I ever knew from Texas was this girl at Girl Scout camp when I was 9.   We had the misfortune of bunking together and I swear that the entire time all she did was talk about "In Texas we do...."  "Texas has ...."   "Texans do/don't..."

Nobody cared.  

So the truth about Texas?   Okay here is the truth for those of you who aren't fortunate enough to be "Texan".   There are a few things Texans love beyond reason.  If you know a Texan, love a Texan, or just visit Texas, these are the things you should understand.  Most make me scratch my head but a few are really worth it.  Here they are in no particular order.

Texans Love:

Meals at Whataburger under 500 calories.
I am not going to lie here, I don't get it.   It's a hamburger.  It isn't the best burger I have ever eaten by far,  not even close.   It is fast food and while it isn't as greasy as McDonald's, it is just a burger.  Oh, and their special ketchup?  The regular kind is....Ketchup.   People go crazy for this stuff.  It tastes different.   Maybe it has a little extra vinegar but it is just KETCHUP.   The spicy is okay but in large doses it is too much.  My husband hates it.  I tolerate it at times.   Really, the love is unreasonable.  People who leave Texas and come back make Whataburger their first stop the minute they get back to Texas.   I think I may eat 2 a year.  Nothing they make can't be made better at home.  Really, my taquitos are the BOMB and my husband's burgers are even better than that.   If I want a burger on the run, they are okay but I am not going to lie, I like Carl's Junior better.

I survived the Blue Bell Famine of 2015 shirt - Gray shirt:
Oh. My. GAWD!   The summer of 2015 will be surely go down as one of the darkest moments in Texas History!   Why?  Well, first Blue Bell stopped selling ice cream then Whataburger stopped selling taquitos.  Dear lord, the world was coming to an end.  Every time I got on Facebook or Twitter people were in panic. (Don't get me, a chicken lady, started on how it is pathetic people can't buy eggs and make their own breakfast.  It is the simplest thing in the world!)    Blue Bell is okay.  I mean, I liked it a lot the first time I ate it....when I was 10!   Now?  Well there are actually a lot of ice cream and frozen yogurts that I appreciate more.  I am not 10 anymore, after all. My taste has actually learned to appreciate a finer quality of ice cream.    Still, don't tell a Texan that God didn't gift them with Blue Bell because they are sure it is actually the closest thing to heaven on earth.  

Dr Pepper:
They drink it for breakfast, lunch, dinner.  They drink it in the ballparks, football fields, deer stands.  They drink it everywhere.  I seriously think some of them take it to the bathroom with them.  If you drink coke or pepsi you are obviously a Yankee because no self respecting Texan drinks anything but Dr. Pepper and don't even pretend with anything but the real stuff.   Don't be surprised if you go somewhere and ask for a 'coke' if they ask you what kind, either.  They aren't being funny and they aren't offering you a wide variety of flavored coke.  They mean do you want a Coke, Dr Pepper, Sprite, ect.   They call everything Coke here.

Sweet Tea
Alright when they are not drinking Dr. Pepper or beer (see below), they are drinking sweet tea.  It's ice tea with sugar.  No biggie but they have recipes for it.   They are darn near militant about how it should be made.  You use simple syrup which is basically sugar dissolved in hot water. Then you brew really strong tea and add the simple syrup.  That is apparently the right way to do it so I have been told.  Guess what?  As long as the tea is strong enough, I can't actually tell the difference between real sweet tea and what I make which is tea without sugar and added Truvia.   Don't tell the Texans though!

Chips and Salsa/Queso/Guac
Okay seriously this is one of the greatest things ever!  I mean as soon as you get seated at any good Tex-Mex place you get a heaping bowl of chips and many bowls of salsa. If you are feeling really adventurous you may get a side of queso or guacamole.  Life is good in Texas when you are eating Tex-Mex.

Texans love beer.  Especially Shiner.  Now here is another thing I do agree on with them.  Usually, if I do drink beer, which I don't often, I will chose Shiner because, well it's good...for beer.

Football is king in Texas.  High School football takes up 20 minutes of the nightly news on Friday nights in DALLAS during the fall.  I swear you have never seen anything like the football fever.   Me?  I prefer baseball so I just sit back and watch.

Joe T Garcia's.... Love everything here.... the food the atmosphere... EVERYTHING!!!
Margarita's and Joe T's
Alright, there are a few places in Texas that make amazing Margarita's and this one is definitely completely worth it.  For my money Baby A's in Austin has great Rita's and there are several places in San Antonio that make a Prickly Pear Rita that would make you drool.   In DFW the best is definitely Joe T Garcia's in Ft Worth.   I stand with every Texan in the love of Margarita's.   They are well worth the sip. 


buc-ees images   Near Houston, Texas  2012:
Nobody gets excited about going to the gas station unless it is Buc-ee's.  Oh lord in heaven there is no place on earth to fuel up both your vehicle and your body like Buc-ee's.  This isn't just a gas station it is a shopping experience.   Yes, I will agree with the Texans, Buc-ees is the BOMB!

Country Music
No everyone doesn't listen to it.  When I was in high school I thought it was stupid.   I swore I would never give in.  I was not a country fan.   Then I moved to Austin, Texas to go to college and Garth Brooks happened.  Next thing I know, all I listen to is Country or Christian.

Now believe it or not, Texans don't actually wear boots and cowboy hats everywhere, no matter what you saw on "Dallas".  We don't all own oil wells either.  In fact, most of us work regular jobs and it is too darn hot in Texas to wear boots in August...But......


I love winter mostly because I get to pull out my boots.  I have probably 15 pair of  boots, maybe more.  That doesn't really include booties either which is an entirely other issue.  Okay so most of my booties are heels and I don't wear heels much anymore because, let's be honest, where am I wearing them when most of the things I do are outdoors and a lot of it is in the mud?  Not to hunt and not to the ballpark.

No, they are very Texan but they are warm!
Somehow, when I take photos of my boots it is usually my western ones.  Not sure why except they are obviously the Prettiest. Things. Ever!

These are the shortest pair I own and frankly they are the most comfy with jeans. I wish I had them in grey but alas, I didn't pick up both.   Silly me.

These are my favorites, my wedding boots.  I have shared them before but sue me, they are just so amazing!

These are my most colorful.  Love them.   They were one of my first pair.  I have a pair of Ropers that I have had for a long, long, long time.  I can't recall the last time I wore them.  I need to dig them out of the closet. 

Cowboy Hats

Truthfully, I rarely see anyone wearing cowboy hats around town unless I am at a country concert.

Here is me in the same hat looking a little different.   I still crack up at the Halloween pictures.   I swear I should have been a man.  Seriously, these photos freak my husband and kid out.

Okay, so there I am for real.

And hat 2.   Seriously, both these photos are of me going to a country concert.  That is really the only place I ever wear them, except on Halloween, of course!   

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