Friday, June 29, 2012

Friday blog update:Fitness Friday plus scale update!

I have to start with this, thank you, thank you Friday!!!

So, it has been some time since I wrote a Fitness Friday. I have mentioned I started running again. I am shooting for 2 days a week right now. It is a challenge thanks to the crazy Texas heat but I managed this week. I don't love running yet but I will. As my legs get stronger and my body adjusts the running becomes more fun. I know this. It clears my mind and I get outside. All of this is bonus. I can really tell the difference with my legs already. Love it!!!

So the scale. I am not going to lie, the battery was dead and it takes a lithium battery which I don't keep at home so I had to remember to pick one up special and avoid Oreos while doing so. I did this finally yesterday. And.....drum roll......
I lost 2 pounds. That is a total of 77 pounds lost. No more plateau. No more gaining and losing the same 5 pounds for a month!!! Woohoo!

I am trying to be excited about this. I am trying to recognize the accomplishment I have already acheived. This goes against my nature because I tend to see only how far I have to go. A friend told me last night if I want to lose more that is what I should do but I have to recognize what an amazing thing it is that I have done and see the beautiful person I am inside and out right now. I am working on that.

Physical changes come slowly, emotional changes sometimes take even longer. I wore a pair of jeans today that I couldn't wear a week ago. I am happy with that. I went through my jeans and realized stuff that I bought 6 weeks ago is getting loose. I'm happy with that too. How long it will take me to feel normal and not huge, I don't know. I do know this, I have so much more to offer then just the physical and I also know that while I may not be thrilled with what I see, I am pretty. Yes, I said it. I am pretty. So there.

As I was taking this photo today someone stopped me to ask advice on losing weight. I always get a kick out of these conversations because there is only one answer diet & working your butt off at the gym. I do love how encourage everyone is. Especially when it starts with 'OMG you look so little!"

Happy Friday gang.


posted from Bloggeroid

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Blog Update Travel Tuesday

I have been listening to everyone plan vacations and this has me thinking, if I were going somewhere, where would I go? Now, don't get me wrong, I love Texas in the summer. There is nothing like 105 degree days when someone crashes into a power conduit to make you really appreciate Texas. There is something about the challenge of living in the heat, running in the heat, and just plain surviving the heat to really make you love air conditioning.

That being said, I thought where do I really want to go? Beaches are okay. I love swimming and water but there is only so much laying around on a beach a redhead can do. I would like to go to Runaway Bay Jamaica sometime because honestly, who doesn't want to run far away?

Of course if I can go anywhere I want to go to Italy and Cooperstown, NY. Who doesn't, right?

But if I were traveling this summer I would go to the mountains. I love the idea of hikes and swimming and picnics with a little wine and a cute friend. Now, this is my fantasy so my cute friend is going to be a blue eyed brunette, 6'2", solid build with nice arms and a ruggedly handsome not pretty face. (My fantasy man, get your own). I liked the idea of Colorado.

Not wild fire Colorado but maybe Steamboat Springs. Who wouldn't want to be here right now?

Or here

Or here

Or here

That has to be so much better than sitting on a beach. I can see running, biking, hiking, balloon rides, shopping, dancing, swimming, and that picnic with a player to be named later.

That's my summer fantasy vacation, what about you?


posted from Bloggeroid

Monday, June 25, 2012

Blog update: Mobile Monday weekend in review

Friday night was interesting.

It was Rangers game night. Fireworks Friday. I missed the real fireworks and unfortunately caught enough of the "mom drama" kind to make the amazing performance of Roy Oswalt Friday night almost forgotten. Almost, but not quite. Mom's are awesome people and I love mine but she has that 'Catholic Mother' guilt thing down pat. Anyway, enough of mothers.

I know I Blogged this Saturday but lordy it is hot in Texas! I ran 3 miles Saturday morning and did a lot of stuff around the house. I may or may not have been avoiding life for a day. I'm not sure. After yet another inappropriate approach by a creep on the dating site I pulled my profile. I decided it is simply better to be alone. The disgusting lack of respect has a lot to do with it. I have never in my life felt so objectified, ever. I know some may think it is funny to be asked about your sexual preferrences, told by strangers that they want to touch you or kiss you. I know also that those same people who joke about it have never treated me with that much disrespect. It is one thing to say it to someone you know or care about. It is totally another for a man to say that to a woman he has never met.

I did a lot of soul searching this weekend and made a lot of decisions about what I want and I am in a place of complete happiness this morning with me. I realized I am pretty awesome. (The fact that my friends keep telling me this helped me realize it. Thanks my peeps!) I also realized that I am fixing the things that I don't like about myself. I am pushing myself to become better every day. I hope everyone feels that they are doing at least one thing every day to improve themselves. Happiness is a state of mind. I have decided to be happy. I wasn't far anyway. I have just been in a little funk the last few weeks. I'm done. Whatever happens, I am strong, positive, sweet (I really am), silly-goofy, pretty smart, and I am not too hard on the eyes so I think I have it all going for me. Yay me!!!

The Suite Life of Rachel and Laura happened Sunday. If you missed my thrilled tweets yesterday you missed the fact that my friend Rachel managed to get our Sunday tickets upgraded to a suite because of her work. Score!

This was the view.

There was plenty of this available. Thanks to a silly Twitter follower I took that picture to prove I was, in fact, not drinking Haterade! It is not my fault Michael Young wasn't up to my challenge. I wish he would have made me stop talking smack about him. :-)

The Rangers won both games this weekend. They seem to play really well when my friends and I are at the game. They win all of the games. I think we must be good luck charms. Fear not, we will be there Tuesday for Yu!!!

If your Monday is as crazy as mine, my thoughts are with you. Keep going. It has to get better.


posted from Bloggeroid

Saturday, June 23, 2012

Saturday Blog Standing Outside The Fire

I am going to admit that I adore Garth Brooks. No matter what mood I am in, I can count on Garth to have an answer for me. Maybe I just need to spend time with my Friends in Low Places. Maybe I need to remember that heartache is cured by the sea and go drink Two Pina Coladas. Mostly I find what I need most is to stop Standing Outside the Fire.

I know everyone doesn't like country. There is no accounting for taste.....or lack there of. I could have used a cure for heartache back in October when a certain baseball team blew a certain game with one strike..sigh. Yea, that was heartache.

This morning as I ran I listened to Standing Outside the Fire and I realized I did that, for a long time. I gave up and just survived. I didn't treat myself well. I didn't believe in myself. I didn't respect myself. I abused my body and stuffed my feelings with food. Because of that I became this enormous person.

That girl is gone forever. This is the woman I am now.

Not very pretty but I had just completed a 3 mile interval walk-run on a humid 90 degree Dallas morning. Summer is here DFW!
I realized not only am I stronger then others give me credit for being, I'm stronger then I give myself credit for.
My mother says I hold on too long. She is talking mostly about my dad. I carry a hole in my heart that is my father. I don't dwell on this. I don't think about him everyday. I don't cry about missing him all the time. It has been a long, long time. People ask me questions and I am that person that just doesn't bother lying. It is too hard. So I tell them about my father and they say things like 'I'm sorry. That must have been tough'. Yep. It sucks. Running makes me think more about him. My dad was a coach and he was awesome. Just like his little girl.
What I realized long ago was to honor my dad, I had to live my life. Then I stopped because a dumb boy a long time ago broke my heart. I shut down.
I swore I would never give my heart again to anyone who didn't deserve it. I haven't.

What will it do?

All of this has made me more determined to become the person I want to be physically. That means running. That means playing baseball like a girl. That means making a fool of myself infront of my friends and coworkers. That probably doesn't mean continuing with this on-line dating mess. At least, not on the site I have used. I'm just not sold on this and I don't have the time or energy to weed through all these men. (An aside here, if everyone on dating sites are athletic builds why are all the men I see when I walk out the door not? It is amazing really.) I am not kidding when I say it is stupid the number of men that contact me a day. I felt good for about 1 day then I just felt suffocated.

My friend Rachel (that's us below) says she likes to think her husband is out there wondering where she is. That's nice. I would like to think that too. My problem is, somehow I'm not convinced he isn't really out there thinking 'Thank God I am free and can sleep with the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders.'. That's just the kind of guy for me! Lol.

So the long and longer still of this is that I am going to work on becoming a better version of me and always remember that life is merely survived when you're standing outside the fire.

Now I am going to go lift some weights cause I have a lot of work to do if I'm going to learn to love what I see in the mirror. That's the end goal. Loving myself, just me.


posted from Bloggeroid

Friday, June 22, 2012

Friday Blog No Sex In the City? Plus Fitness Friday

Yesterday I mentioned that I had decided to try on-line dating. This isn't the first time I have done this. I actually met my ex through an on-line dating service. Of course, that was 10 years ago and my how things have changed.

Apparently, chivalry is nearly dead. Treating a lady like a lady is a lost art form. I have received messages from men asking me about my sexual appetite and if I like foot massages. I ignored the massage artist. I told off the ones asking about my sexual preferences.

I have been asked out by 5 men between the ages of 25-29. Now, I am willing to go a little younger but honestly I can't fathome what I would talk to a 25 year old about. When I answered a couple of them and told them I was flattered but no, they responded that they really wanted to take me out. One told me he only dates women 35-50. He is 27. The answer was still no.

Apparently there are a bunch of men on DFW who are looking for a nice woman.....either that or a hook-up. I actually changed my profile to say I was not interested in a hook-up. Of course, it also says I want kids and this doesn't seem to stop the men that don't from contacting me. This isn't negotiable. I want a baby. I am not dating anyone ever again that doesn't want a baby or an actual relationship at some point. Look, I am picky. I don't want just any man to be my kids dad. He is going to have to be pretty amazing to get that title..

My mom gave me some advice: Don't sleep with all of them. This is the funniest thing ever, really. I never have been that girl. I made promises to myself after I made some errors in judgement 10 years ago. I have been true to myself. I haven't done anything I didn't actually want to. That's about all I want to share.

So I have been asked out by what seems like a very nice gentleman who has to this point been attentive, polite, funny, and even made sure I was okay when I told him about my accident. We may meet for drinks or lunch. It will be in public. I don't know what to wear. He thinks it is funny and unusual that I am such a baseball nut. Some things never change.

I am still very unsure of all of this. I am also overwhelmed by the response. Truly. I have been feeling lately like the ugly one among my single friends. I have a hot friend and a sweet adorable friend and I just feel like the chubby one. The one nobody wants. This is all on me but I worry. What if they see me and run? What if they think I'm too chubby. I put pictures up. They can see my body. I said that I am chubby. I am confused by all of this. I don't know what to consider myself anymore. I don't think I am big enough to be considered a big beautiful woman but I guess that is a matter of opinion. I am the American average, for what that is worth. I am a work in progress. My mind hasn't caught up with my body and my body isn't where I want it yet. I know this is mostly on me. Maybe it is just that whenever I feel rejected the easiest thing to blame it on is my body. I am not going to lie. I rarely feel sexy. I shoot for cute.

That brings me to Fitness Friday. My scale is broken. Well, not broken. The battery is dead and it takes a special one that I don't keep in stock. That said, I believe I am at a plateau. It isn't a surprise really. I lost so much weight and so fast and I have been working so hard that my body just needs a moment or a few weeks. I have decided to start running again. I have pounded the pavement twice this week and man does it feel amazing. Things become so clear when you run. Last night I ran and cried. It was amazing. I was thinking about my dad because the last time I ran it was training for the half-marathon I ran for cancer charity. I don't run fast and I can't run for more then 5 minutes before I have to walk for a minute or two. I would swear you can already see the difference in my legs. I have muscular legs but I think running actually shapes them better than squats. I am going to keep running as long as my back can take the pounding. This is not easy in Texas in the summer but I am about the most stubborn woman you have ever met.

Happy weekend people. I will be at the Ballpark. Tweet me if you are there! Love to say hi!


posted from Bloggeroid

Thursday, June 21, 2012

It's Okay Thursday Blog Update

It has been a long time since I haven't felt like I was hit by a bus on Thursday night. Hopefully this will break the streak. This week has been a doozie between being sick and being in the car accident. So here is what is okay.

It's okay that I may have joined a dating service. I don't know how I feel about this, honestly but in 24 hours since joining I have been contacted by no less than 40 men. I don't understand it. I am taking my time with this. I am making no decisions other then to put myself out there. It is a huge ego boost that 40 men and a few boys find me attractive enough to contact me. I used several pictures so they can see the good, bad, & ugly. So weird.

It's okay that a male friend said the sweetest words to me the other night that anyone has ever said. He said "Most women don't know how beautiful they are. You don't.' When my female friends say that stuff I don't pay attention but when a guy tells you that you look great or are beautiful, well, it just means more. Even a guy friend.

It"s okay that I had sunflower seeds for breakfast. I have become addicted to these things. I am trying to eat at least one day a week meat free. Today is that day. Handfull of sunflower seeds for breakfast and a Amy's veggie burrito for lunch. No idea what's for dinner.

It's okay that I realized this morning my hair is getting long and I have no clue what to do with it. I really don't. I have been trying to grow it out for so long that now that it is finally getting there, I'm getting nervous. I'm a Leo. Hair means more to us. No really, we don't really have hair we have a mane. It's a fact. You may also decide to call me "Your Majesty" if you think you should. I am royalty after all. Queen of my universe.

It's okay there is no Rangers game today. I need a rest. I need a break from Twitter. It would be good if I could have a long break from Twitter but when I try, I just can't quit it. I'm a Twitter addict.

It's okay that I hurt today and I am going to run tonight anyway. I refuse to give in to muscle spasms in my shoulders just because....I am stubborn. Besides, apparently I am going to be dating 40 men soon and I need to look cute!

So, what's okay with you?


posted from Bloggeroid

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

What I'm Loving Wednesday-Auto Accident Style

Well, let's see. I am loving that the lady that hit me at lunch has no insurance.
I'm loving that she has a car full of kids and one on the way.
I'm loving that she also has no drivers license.
I'm loving that she actually managed to make me feel sorry for her.
I'm loving so much the stiff neck and shoulders that are keeping me from running tonight.

Okay, maybe not. I do appreciate that hopefully my unibody vehicle doesn't have frame damage. I do appreciate that none of the kids in her car seemed too worse for the accident. I do appreciate that there is absolutely no way it was my fault. I also appreciate that I have been on auto insurance my entire life and I carry uninsured motorist coverage so I'm not stuck as much.

As for what I'm loving, I don't know. I love the friends that saw my Tweet or Facebook status and contacted me to make sure I am really okay. I appreciate those of you that care and those of you telling me to go get checked out even though you know I won't listen unless I am severe pain. Nothing else really comes to mind. I'm a little overwhelmed right now.


posted from Bloggeroid

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Tuesday's Blog Update

I'm not feeling well so this leaves me too much time to think. Never a good thing, or is it?

I decided today to count my blessings so here are my top 10:

10.My Job: it drives me crazy sometimes and it isn't what I want to do forever but it is a really good job.

9. My health: aside from a crappy fever, upset stomach, headache, and dizziness today and a bad back everyday and migraines at times, I am pretty healthy. I don't take that for granted. I can't stand sitting still. It drives me crazy. I can't even stand being sick for a day.

8.My personality. For those of you who don't know me, I am a fool. I am a clown. I am a smartass. I can be a real pain in the butt and selfish at times. I am also very silly. I'm okay making a fool of myself sometimes. I like me. I really do. I would be my friend. I am loyal. I have a huge heart. I can cook. I'm a winner.

7. I'm smart: this may shock some of you. This girl may do dumb things but she isn't a dummy. I went to Texas after all. Everyone can't. Even if I left before I finished. That was because I was young and homesick and I wanted to be at Notre Dame.

6.Hobbies: I have many. They keep me sane when baseball season is over. I craft, workout, I'm running again, I garden (I need to get on that. My flower beds look terrible). I paint. I draw. I ride my bike around Lewisville. Actually that makes me feel like a kid. There are a few hills in the area that suck running but on a bike they are AMAZING. I love to swim a fish. In quiet times, I read. I know some people think I am all about sports and nothing more but they don't really know me. That's okay. Judge me haters. Who cares.

5.Faith: this is really more important to me than #5. It is probably my true #1. Without God I have nothing. Without Him, I am nothing. Those of you who don't believe I have no clue how you do it. Truly. I would never be able to make a day without talking to God. Praying for direction. Begging for advice. He always answers me. Yes, I hear the answers and that is my biggest blessing. I truly feel sad for those who have no Faith. Very sad.

4. My house: it is little and there are things I want to improve on with it but it is mine and I am doing it alone. I can't tell you how important that is to me. I can't tell you how hard that has been. I bought this house in 1999. I have ripped up all the floors.
Repainted more times then I can count. I have replaces doors, appliances, air conditioners, sewer pipes, leaking faucets, roofs, and there is so much more to do. Kitchen counters. The rest of the floors. Sidewalks. It truly never ends. I hyperventilate at times when I think about it. Still, I manage. Alone.

3. The best dogs in the world. They drive me nuts and make me laugh and they wake me up every single day at 3:45 which is just annoying but I love them.

2. I have a wonderful set of friends and family. They believe in me even when I don't. They tell me I am beautiful even though I don't believe them. They don't judge me for my mistakes they just love me and tell me I am awesome.

1. I never married the wrong person. There is a reason this is my #1. It is better to be alone than be married to someone who doesn't rock your world or make you crazy. I want crazy. I want passion. I want excitement. I want romance and love. Real love. I want to be in-love. I don't have that in my life but I would rather not have it than be stuck with someone who isn't compatible with me in every single way that matters and he needs to feel that way about me too. I know relationships develop and change but the thing is I need some fire in my life. I am a redhead for heavens sake. I know I said I don't want to be married. That isn't true. I do. I just don't believe I will ever meet anyone who makes me feel that way. I never have. I won't settle. Being alone sucks on national holidays and late at night but the sun comes up and the loneliness goes away and I remember how blessed I am not to be stuck with an ex-husband or worse an ex-wife.


posted from Bloggeroid

Monday, June 18, 2012

Mobile Monday

Friday night I spent a quiet night at home watching the Rangers beat the Astros and a movie with.a friend from Twitter.

My awesome friend Rachel however managed to snag me a yearbook at the game! Did I mention we won?

Saturday was pedicures and lunch with Trish before the game. I know I have said before I hate my feet. I hate my everything but my toes turned out so cute....for my toes.

There were simply a bunch of my friends at the game Saturday. More were there then I actually saw.

The Rangers gave away Nolan Ryan Retro T-Shirts and they had a 1986 theme going.

This is one of my favorite team logos. Did I mention we won?

Sunday it was back to the ballpark even though I was starting to get sick.

Love this shot. See the Texas flag peeking through?

I was with Rachel, of course!

I also met up with Chance and Camden. I adore you both!!!!!

And got to meet my Twitter friend Whitney for the first time. Always nice to meet another redhead!

It was a truly fun weekend. I learned a lot but I will save that for another blog. Hope you had a great weekend. Happy Monday!

posted from Bloggeroid

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

What I'm loving Wednesday

I'm all over the place today so bare with me.

First I love this shirt I am wearing today and to the game tonight. It is my favorite.

I'm loving this, which I stole from my brothers Facebook. So funny!
So true! People are crazy! I know, I am one of them!

Crunchy hazelnut spread. Omg this stuff is awesome. I don't eat it a lot but I don't feel just horrible about eating it when I do because sometimes a little chocolate is called for and at least this way I can get a little protein.

My new attitude toward anyone trying to fit me into their mold. Who I am and what I want changes daily. It's called growth. Everything I write I mean, when I write it. Tomorrow it may all change.

Well, honestly I may be a little of both of these things but generally I restrict my teasing to a select one. He can handle it.

And besides he is incredibly fun to tease. I can't quit. So sue me!

This is my new goal in life. I have only one regret and it is 20 years old so I decided to let it go. That makes me regret free. You heard me, I don't regret anything or anyone. I am making myself take chances. I won't live life looking back with a list of should haves. I just want to have fun. Nobody should get hurt in the process.

I really love this. I can't say I love me but a smart friend of mine said to me recently that if your friends think you are awesome and you think they are, they must be right about you. (well, Micah you said something like that.)

So here is the starter list. I need to post this.

And this.

I found this quote yesterday and I simply adore it!

I love these cupcakes. I was thinking, I could do these in chocolate, make a baseball sugar cookie for the top and then someone(s) lucky would get the cupcake and the cookie, someday!! (Yep, I am a tease!)

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad all rights reserved

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