Tuesday, November 12, 2013

My Weekend Revelation: City Girl Survival Guide of the Woods

There are people who have debated if I really was a female since, well the doctor swore to my mother she was having a boy. I love sports in a way that seems unnatural to some women. I am not afraid to fall and do it regularly when I bike and will again, hopefully soon! I am a funny sort of female. I love handbags and shoes but I don't mind sitting on the dirt and hanging out with nature so when the man in my life said "baby come hunting with me!" I thought, why not? Him, me, nature, and a deer blind!

And maybe a buck or doe and a chance to enjoy nature. I mean...it is beautiful!

The sky and trees and just everything clean and amazing and fresh. How could I turn down spending all that time outside with him? Outside!

So, the thing I forgot about going hunting is that when you hunt, things may actually get shot....and I am a big baby! I cry at cotton commercials for heavens sake! I am the softest of softies. Yes, I have seen the dead animals before...they were dead. They weren't being shot. Watching that was not something I was actually prepared for so I handled it really badly. So keeping that in mind I prepared a sort of City Girl Survival Guide to the Woods

-Knowing how to survive in the city and knowing how to survive in the country are not that different. You can't go walking alone in downtown Dallas and you shouldn't go off running around the woods by yourself if people are shooting guns. Both can be extremely stupid and dangerous.

-It is always better to think first and second and not think 45 minutes later because thinking later could get you dead.

-No matter how cute a coyote is, it is still a dangerous wild animal and not a dog. Don't feed it because it will take your hand too!

-If a vine has fuzzy stuff growing on it, it is better to just not touch it.

-Always be prepared: you never can have enough water, protein bars or TOILET PAPER! (That stuff doesn't grow on trees & remember stay away from the fuzzy vines!)

-Practice saying "yes, dear." Just do it.

-Carry your cell but know that it won't always work. Cell coverage in the woods is a "can you hear me now" experience.

-Always, Always, Always in the event of emergencies know where the nearest town is. You are probably going to need to run out of something as an excuse to find running water and a flush toilet just to stay sane!

-No matter how much you want to, don't drink too much! Those 3am pee breaks in the woods suck when it's cold even if you have a portable potty. COLD! Oh and if it's raining....you are going to be really jealous of your man!

-Watch out for Grapevines, slippery logs, and anything that you can trip over. No kidding! One of my first camping trips with 'the guy, I went out in the woods while he napped and fell on a log and hit my head. Thankfully, I didn't hit it hard enough to pass out because he has no idea where I was and never would have found me. I would have ended up Hog & Raccoon food.

-Never underestimate proper shoes! Just because they work in Ft. Worth does not mean they are perfect for East Texas woods. Things are not the same. The bobcats maybe similar but the abundance of wild hogs and coyotes alone are probably not.

Just remember that you may be an expert at surviving Black Friday sales and your guy may know how to survive the woods. There are benefits to both. He may be able to hunt down a deer or hog but who is he going to turn to when he wants a knew leather sofa and big screen TV to watch the game? You of course because that's your hunting ground! Be proud of who you are and the strengths you have. Personally, I like being a girlie girl when it matters but I am still not afraid to get a little dirty with my man once in awhile. Hopefully, he can survive it! Remember things may die in the woods, make sure it isn't you!

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