Have you ever had those moments when your human skepticism has to do battle with the spiritual right thing to do and you fail?
I struggle is with the little things. The money struggles. Trusting God with that part and letting go.
Twice in my life I have been approached by young women in parking lots for "gas money". Once by a woman holding an infant. Once by a young woman with an angelic face. Both times I had the rare $5.00 in my purse and didn't surrender it. Both times I have gone into the store, debated with myself that the $5.00 isn't worth the guilt if they really are in need and gone back out to give them the money only to find them gone.
The reason I consider this a failure is that as a Christian I am called to see Jesus in everyone. I would not hesitate to give the $5.00 to Jesus so why do I hesitate to give it to God's children? I had a long talk with myself about this on the way in today and decided that I will just give the $5.00 next time because the guilt is too much and I would rather risk being taken for a little money than live with the thought someone was in need and I didn't help when I could.
Trusting is hard. How do you let go and let God?
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