Sunday, February 3, 2013
This was a quiet weekend on purpose. I wanted to spend time with some of my girls and just be privately silly.
Friday night I went over to my BFF's house. (She had been sick all week and wouldn't let me take photos of her!) It had been over a year since we actually hung out. I don't know why. She said I am always busy and never home! Anyway, I had a lot of stuff to catch her up on and she and my God Daughter, Melody caught me up on all the goings on in her household. The great thing about a BFF who has known you for 18 years is she understands where you have been so when she gives you advice she can cut right to the point.
I have been thinking about adoption for a couple years so when I started talking to Alaina about it and her response was "it is going to be easier for you to go to a clinic or get knocked up." I knew. Alaina is the most faithful Catholic I know and she would never advise me to do that. Further she knew me well enough to know I would never intentionally bring a baby into this world without a dad or try and trap a man. That's not to say I haven't done the wrong things. That's not to say I haven't had a pregnancy scare, I have. Twice actually. I also knew I would never have told the guys. Neither of them. Not because I was selfish but because I couldn't stand the idea of forcing a relationship on a man or a child. That's me. Anyway, it wasn't to be. I guess God has other plans for me. I still feel like there is a child in my future and given the fact I was surrounded by them, I hope I am right. I can love any child, that's the easy part. Trying to think about never having one is the thing that makes me cry.
I wish you could have seen Alaina's face when we talked about mountain biking. I wish you could see mine. I'm pretty sure I light up. She shook her head and laughed when I described how awesome the falls are. Face planting and flying over handle bars don't happen now the way they used to but I also haven't been riding much thanks to weather and migraines.
She stopped me at one point in our conversation and said "Wow, you are so much more confident. I've never seen you like this."
It is true. In the last year I have found myself. A little of that is a result of heartache and a lot of that is because of mountain biking. From both I learned more about myself and found my strength. It's awesome when you accomplish something you never thought you could and it is equally amazing when you really realize your self worth. I'm not there completely but I am closer than I have ever been. I am realizing that if someone wants to be with me they have to work at it. They have to open up and say "I care about you and I want to be in your life". They have to make me a priority not a side thought. I deserve someone awesome and I will fight for a relationship but I won't fight alone. So, if that is confidence, I all over it!
This was a day for cleaning and hanging out with the roomie.
I started the morning off by working on the house and trying to make organization out of chaos: My Kitchen. Honestly when I bought my house I was coming from a tiny apartment kitchen with a few cabinets and no pantry and I thought my galley kitchen was huge! 14 years later exactly (I bought the house and moved in mid Feb 1999. Not bad for a single 28 year old at the time!) my kitchen just doesn't have the space I want. The pantry is too small. The cabinets are over flowing and I really want a new Fridge. This one is, after all 14 years old and I would love to move it to the garage for sodas and stuff.
When Rachel woke up we were both hungry so we decided Spring Creek was a great idea. Yum!! Brisket is one of my exceptions on the no beef rule. It is totally worth flossing!
Saturday night Trish and her lovely daughters came over and we laughed our bottoms off! (Probably because we are so cool we sit around in our sunglasses in the house...or maybe I forgot to get a picture so I improvised?)
We had a blast and the only sad part was...I was the only one drinking wine. It is really good to be silly and sit around and discuss pressing world issues like how hot is Ryan Gosling? How does George Clooney keep getting hotter? Why am I still in love with Christian Slater? How stupid are boys? (This was in the name of educating Trish's teenage girls). Of course we also discussed the long term importance of Lorena Bobbitt on American womanhood. (That was truly funny). Finally at one point in the evening Trish's amazingly beautiful 14 year old looks at us and says: "I never realized adults could have such cool conversations." To which I said "You have no idea how cool your mom is...which is the way it's supposed to be right now, but what did you think we talked about but how stupid men are?" She said "Taxes and how much you hate your job and stuff like that." Rachel responded "Oh we talk about that sometime too!"
If Trish's girls and my God Daughter are an example, the future for women in this state is bright!
Is there anyway possible to avoid this football game? I quit Twitter in an effort.
First I went to church. It was the first time I was really back at St. Ann's in almost 2 years.
10 am mass is always full and I was relegated to the balcony. Don't ask how I shot this picture. Nobody was watching, I promise. I love this church. I love how beautiful it is. I love how Catholic it is. I love that it feels like home even if there are over 8000 families with 30000 people that go there. (Half apparently make 10am mass!)
One of the readings was 1 Corinthians. I rolled my eyes but I opened my ears anyway.
This is what I got from the service. (yes, it's my Facebook status...and?)
(forgive the typos...I was cold and have a bit of a headache.)
I was rocking my socks for Sunday Funday!
Here I am supporting my team of choice on Superbowl Sunday! (Every once in a while you have to let your curly hair be happy too.)
QT with my pups
No Superbowl for me. I couldn't care less about either team. Instead I spent some time alone thinking and some time with Cary Grant.
I went to bed at 8:30 and should have known after doing nothing all weekend that was a bad sign. Woke up this morning feeling icky so going back to sleep.
Well, that's the weekend round-up. Hope you had a nice one. Happy new week.
-Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Posted by Laura @Simply Me, The way I see it
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